How to Talk to Your Child About Bullying

Oct 9, 2018 12:00:00 AM

by

This month is National Bullying Prevention Month. As a principal, have a zero-tolerance policy for bullying. I decided to address this issue because parents need to be aware of bullying and the devastating impact it can have on children.

Here Are a Few Tips to Combat Bullying

  1. Have a serious conversation with your child about bullying. Physical bullying increases in elementary school and peaks in middle school. If your child is being bullied he/she should report it immediately to the principal or assistant principal. It is imperative to correct the situation before it gets out of control.
  2. Students love to quote the phrase, “Snitches get stitches.” When someone is planning to cause harm to another person it needs to be reported immediately. This is not snitching. This is saving someone’s life. Teaching students to discern when to tell and when not to tell can be challenging. They need to know that they are helping a victim in a situation that could result in tragedy.
  3. Cyberbullying is when kids bully one another through electronic devices. The bully posts mean messages, emails, spreads rumors, and posts embarrassing pictures of the person. If this is happening to your child, document the activity and print all messages. This documentation will be necessary when you report the offense to the proper authorities.
  4. The effects of bullying can be traumatic. Students who are bullied are at risk of suicide and it is important for them to obtain support. According to the Centers for Disease Control, students who are bullied are more likely to experience low self-esteem and isolation, have few friends, perform poorly in school, have headaches or stomach aches, experience anxiety, suicidal thoughts, and depression. There are children who have committed suicide which is why it is important to have a great level of communication with your children.
  5. Teach your child compassion and empathy. Talk to them about the way they like to be treated and how they like to feel. Then discuss how they do not like to be treated and how that feels.
  6. If your child witnesses bullying they should not laugh or escalate the situation. Bystanders are either a part of the problem or a part of the solution. They have the power to use problem solving strategies to stop bullying.
  7. If your child is the bully, examine what is going on in your home environment or try to find the root cause of why your child is behaving this way. Think about your actions and how you communicate with people. Parents are their child’s first teacher and they are watching what you say and do. They need to know the seriousness of the situation and know that consequences will be given for their behavior.
Parents, please be sure to ask your child about their day and be specific about asking if someone is bothering them or making them feel uncomfortable. No child should live in fear while attending school.

Shanessa Fenner

Shanessa Fenner is an elementary principal and has also been a middle school principal. She holds a bachelor’s degree in elementary education, two master’s degrees in elementary education and school administration, and a doctorate in educational leadership. She also received the North Carolina Principal Fellows Scholarship. Fenner is very active in her community as well as other things. She has a TV show entitled “Let’s Talk with Dr. Shanessa Fenner” and is the host of “The Bronco Exchange” which is a TV show for Fayetteville State University. She is also co-host of a radio show called “iTeach.” In her free time, she is an actor and does voiceover work. She is a writer for Up & Coming Weekly, The Fayetteville Press Newspaper, Array Magazine, and many other publications. She is a former radio personality for KISS 107.7 FM. She has a girl’s group at her school called Dr. Fenner’s Young Women of Distinction. The group meets bi-monthly. Fenner has high expectations for the students at her school and many of her conversations focus around college, lifelong learning, and achieving great things. She believes that people were placed on Earth to do great things and that is what she plans on doing.

The Feed

Explainers

  • What's an IEP and How to Ensure Your Child's Needs Are Met?

    Ed Post Staff

    If you have a child with disabilities, you’re not alone: According to the latest data, over 7 million American schoolchildren — 14% of all students ages 3-21 — are classified as eligible for special...

  • Seeking Justice for Black and Brown Children? Focus on the Social Determinants of Health

    Laura Waters

    The fight for educational equity has never been just about schools. The real North Star for this work is providing opportunities for each child to thrive into adulthood. This means that our advocacy...

  • Why Math Identity Matters

    Lane Wright

    The story you tell yourself about your own math ability tends to become true. This isn’t some Oprah aphorism about attracting what you want from the universe. Well, I guess it kind of is, but...